Investing in the future me.

Apparently that's what I've been doing lo these many months, or so says Dr. Matt to the news that, in addition to taking up therapeutic massage, I'm also starting instruction in Anusara yoga!

Man, it's been awhile since I've posted, and things are chugging along quite nicely, especially after my massage with Jennifer on Tuesday. I have to stop myself from snickering as I lay there on the warm table listening to peaceful jungle sounds, focusing on my breathing and thinking to myself "Ow! Bastard!" But psoas work HURTS, as does the teres work we started to try to address my shoulder issues. Yowsah. Still, though, usually when I'm sick I find myself thinking over and over again "I feel like death" and for the first time after my massage I thought "I feel like life!" It was great, and then the nausea set in, apparently a regular side effect of psoas work. It wasn't terrible, and I didn't actually... ah... expectorate, shall we say, but it lasted more than an hour and was rather unpleasant.

That said, however, my left side (extensive pelvic bruising aside) feels ace! The Psoas Book talks about how growth and motion happen in spirals (like fractal broccoli!) and I've been aware for some time of how my left leg does a little circle around itself with every step. Damndest thing being that, after my massage stretched my psoas out, I not only felt like my leg was an inch longer but also noticed that the spiral in my gait was gone, replaced by my left arm making circles out and away from me as I walked. Weeeiiirrrd! Cool, though, as I notice more and more the interrelation of all body parts, and especially how so much of the pain I've experienced is really rooted in the psoas. I told Dr. Hoo that yesterday and she said "Well, as a chiropractor I have a different interpretation of that, but that's your truth right now and you should embrace it!" haha So cute she is.

I never would have guessed how much dysplasia would turn me into some sort of new age nutter, but I'm ever-so-grateful John and Ali referred me to the Rushfords, the Rushfords to Jennifer, and Jennifer to Anjali, who runs Yoga Mountain in Montpelier. I'll be doing a 2-hour Restorative Yoga session there Sunday, which consists, as near as I can tell, of complete relaxed passivity while poses are achieved through the use of props and pillows. Sounds like just the thing I need! Next Friday I have a private Anusara lesson with Anjali so we can figure out what limitations I might have on my practice before joining her regular classes. Anusara is very rooted in anatomy, which should make it perfectly suited to my needs... or my body's needs, I guess...

Funny thing about the past near-year is how dramatically it's altered my relationship with my body. On Tuesday Jennifer noted how my lefthand glute was "bracing" (basically tensing indefinitely) to stabilize my hip, and as I started to sigh about more faulty musculature she paused a moment and said "Smart body!" And what a smart way of looking at it! Thank you, left butt, for trying to spare me some pain!

And did I mention it's looking decidedly Springy out these days?! SO very nice to walk around town without fearing for the life of my lower extremities. I'm itching to get out on the discgolf course, and bound and determined to get some good days in in the ever-shorter time I have before surgery. Ooh and tomorrow I'm going to order my crutches! And my hip kit, which is decidedly less exciting. I forget which medical professional it was that suggested, when I mentioned my dilemma about cleaning Augus's litter box when I'm on crutches, that I can use the hip kit grabber because it's got "such a good grip". ahahaha I'm hoping she intended that I use it to grab the litter scoop and not perhaps some more direct method!

Funny, too, how even though I can't remember who said that I can still pick a pronoun without hesitation - every person I've relied on through this whole process (with the exception of orthopedists Drs. Bean and Kim, but I've barely spent any time with them) has been a woman. Handy, since so much of their work has involved poking around my pelvis! I am truly truly grateful for their steady guidance, and for my own willingness to ask question after question, dig deep into research, and explore options I would never have considered a year ago. Yay me! Oh, and yay them, too. ;)